Lately I have become aware that the secret, if it be called a secret, to faith is understanding that faith is a gift from God. We cannot make ourselves believe. God gives us everything, including the insight of faith. The only thing we humans need do is accept God's grace.
People who work at believing in God are doomed to fail. I know; I worked at it for years, and had little to show for my efforts. Those who seek belief must prepare their souls to accept belief. This we do though quiet, moral living and through prayer or contemplation with a quiet mind. We must divest ourselves of the empty desires of this world, and realize that the physical pleasures of living, while good, are incomplete. Once we understand that we are incomplete in and of ourselves we can look to God and wait for the light to pour in.
Today: Rosary #25 Intention: For the salvation of my wife.
Monday, January 29, 2007
Friday, January 19, 2007
Number 17
Today's rosary is devotion number 17.
Intention: Increase my faith.
Two days ago my intention was to decrease my anxiety. After I prayed this rosary I thought nothing more of it.
I am in the habit of having one drink a day. Not every day, but most days. My choice is usually a double scotch. The drink cuts through my anxiety and helps me to sleep. I realize this is not healthy, but in my defense, I never get drunk, and I never have more than one. Still, the habit does concern me sometimes.
The next night after this intention for less anxiety, I was saying the rosary as usual. Somewhere around the third decade, I realized I had not had my daily nightcap. I had not even thought about it. This was because I felt no anxiety. My prayer had been answered, and I almost did not notice it.
It is easy to say that prayers are not always answered. But I wonder how often a prayer is answered, but in such a subtle way that the supplicant misses it.
Intention: Increase my faith.
Two days ago my intention was to decrease my anxiety. After I prayed this rosary I thought nothing more of it.
I am in the habit of having one drink a day. Not every day, but most days. My choice is usually a double scotch. The drink cuts through my anxiety and helps me to sleep. I realize this is not healthy, but in my defense, I never get drunk, and I never have more than one. Still, the habit does concern me sometimes.
The next night after this intention for less anxiety, I was saying the rosary as usual. Somewhere around the third decade, I realized I had not had my daily nightcap. I had not even thought about it. This was because I felt no anxiety. My prayer had been answered, and I almost did not notice it.
It is easy to say that prayers are not always answered. But I wonder how often a prayer is answered, but in such a subtle way that the supplicant misses it.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
The Seven Storey Mountain
Recently I have been reading The Seven Storey Mountain by Thomas Merton. This book is remarkable in many ways, but most meaningfully in the way Merton describes his gradual withdrawl from earthly concerns. This journey is quite moving, and it emphasizes an idea lost to modern life: Life is at its most peaceful and an harmonious when the individual is able to disengage from its cares.
Some critics of religion argue that it is just this disengagement that makes faith so ruinous. How can the world be made better when some of its most virtuous withdraw from it into their own world? This criticism only works if one denies the supernatural. If there is a life beyond our own natural world, then preparing for it and interacting with it is perfectly sensible. And at any rate, the world will always be full of evil as long as there are people in it willing to turn away from goodness. Those people who think humans can fight evil on human terms have missed the point.
It is impossible to fight evil on a personal basis when the cause of evil is within. This is like a man trying to steady a falling tree while he is sitting on one of its branches. Goodness comes from outside of us, not from within. And unless humans become attuned to this fact, improvement in the temporal world is impossible.
Some critics of religion argue that it is just this disengagement that makes faith so ruinous. How can the world be made better when some of its most virtuous withdraw from it into their own world? This criticism only works if one denies the supernatural. If there is a life beyond our own natural world, then preparing for it and interacting with it is perfectly sensible. And at any rate, the world will always be full of evil as long as there are people in it willing to turn away from goodness. Those people who think humans can fight evil on human terms have missed the point.
It is impossible to fight evil on a personal basis when the cause of evil is within. This is like a man trying to steady a falling tree while he is sitting on one of its branches. Goodness comes from outside of us, not from within. And unless humans become attuned to this fact, improvement in the temporal world is impossible.
Number 15
Devotion: To relieve my anxiety.
Today's prayer is a meditation on my anxiety. I feel anxiety about almost everything, Anxiety is, among other things, produced by attachement to things of this world. We fear loss, and so we worry. The gospel tells us that we should be like the lillies of the field, who neither spin nor weave, and yet are clothed in great glory.
I used to take this to mean that if we believe we will be taken care of. This is true, but the promise is not for this world, but the next. Those who properly pray and reflect on life understand that life includes many burdens, and no clear promises. The clear promises come in the next life.
Today's prayer is a meditation on my anxiety. I feel anxiety about almost everything, Anxiety is, among other things, produced by attachement to things of this world. We fear loss, and so we worry. The gospel tells us that we should be like the lillies of the field, who neither spin nor weave, and yet are clothed in great glory.
I used to take this to mean that if we believe we will be taken care of. This is true, but the promise is not for this world, but the next. Those who properly pray and reflect on life understand that life includes many burdens, and no clear promises. The clear promises come in the next life.
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
In principio creavit Deus caelum et terram
I start with the first line of the Vulgate, the Roman Catholic Latin Bible. The translation is, "In the Beginning, God created heaven and the earth."
This being a new year, I have adopted a resolution: to say the rosary 289 times. Why 289? Because the city of New Orleans is 289 this year. Call it a city novena.
No city in America needs its prayers more than New Orleans does.
In my entire life, I doubt I have said the rosary 25 times. It has, in fact, been so long that I had to look up the procedure on the internet before I started. Thus, such a long an arduous devotion will be an experience. That is why I am documenting my progress here.
I started my devotion on December 30, giving myself a slight head start on the year. As of today I have completed 14 rosary sayings. Since I have never prayed so much before, part of this journey will be to record the effects of this devotion upon me. There is no telling what prayer may do to a person.
This being a new year, I have adopted a resolution: to say the rosary 289 times. Why 289? Because the city of New Orleans is 289 this year. Call it a city novena.
No city in America needs its prayers more than New Orleans does.
In my entire life, I doubt I have said the rosary 25 times. It has, in fact, been so long that I had to look up the procedure on the internet before I started. Thus, such a long an arduous devotion will be an experience. That is why I am documenting my progress here.
I started my devotion on December 30, giving myself a slight head start on the year. As of today I have completed 14 rosary sayings. Since I have never prayed so much before, part of this journey will be to record the effects of this devotion upon me. There is no telling what prayer may do to a person.
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